"Stress Day"

Today was a major "I miss you days" I had to go to the hospital for a "stress" test. I have not been to RCH since the day after Bryon died, so as I went to check in for my tests I had minor meltdown. It brought back so many memories, taking Bryon there, registering him. They asked for my Carecard and I reached into my purse and grabbed the first one there....it was Bryons. For about a minute I couldn't talk. When I finlly found my voice I explained to the clerk about Bryon and all the memories being here brought back. On top of all this my daughter was sitting in emergency.I went to check on her and had to walk past the cubicle where Bryon had been, where I said "good bye" to him. My daughter has this rash, to put it mildly, more like boils that are infected all over her body.Extremely itchy and sore. She was seen at another hospital on the weekend where they ran tests. She went to her own doctor today to get the results and he sent her to RCH as it is a major hospital.Not one doctor, of all the specialists she saw today could tell her what she had. Oh she created quite a stir, doctors coming in to take pictures of her hand, but no help could they offer. Some offered ideas that ranged from a major infection to a drug allergy, as she had been on antibiotics for a throat infection. Tomorrow is yet another specialist. I felt so alone when I came home to our house, our empty house. There was no one to talk to, to comfort me, to tell me everything would be alright, your hand was not there for me to reach out and hold. On a lighter note, I must have a strong heart for the stress test turned out really well. What a surprise given all the stress I was under.