an New Chapter

It seems that on each anniversary, two so far, a new chapter is started in my life book.At first I wondered how I would make it through each day, week, month, without my husband.  But here I am, starting my third year. Well meaning friends have told me that I seem to have adjusted well. Not to demean their good intentions, let's face it, what choice do I have? in my world none. Kick ass and get on with life. I try, and sometimes it's really hard, to stay positive, to remember how lucky I am to have known Bryon and to have been loved by him. People, including my family, ask me if I will ever "date" again. I don't know the answer to that. In my mind I am still very married.  There are times when I think it might be nice to have a male friend, someone to talk to, go for walks, to help fill the void. It is the last part of that sentence that scares me and tells me I am not ready to allow someone into my life. I have to learn how to fill the void on my own. If and when I get to the point that I do not compare men to Bryon, then perhaps I might entertain the idea of a companion. I understand that someone else might be able to enrich my life, to guide me in new directions, to expand who I am. Knowing my luck it will happen when I am 102 years young or maybe I will meet someone when I am dancing at our great grandsons wedding in 20 years or so. Life is full of surprizes, it is not like the lottery where you pay your money and probably lose. Each day that I wake up is like winning the lottery, for who knows what will happen.

Always in my thoughts Bryon.