Ramblings

This post is being written after a sleeping pill. I don't think I am addicted to them, it's just if I don't take something my mind goes back to Bryon dead in the hospital and my good bye or to digging his grave,lowering him down and shovelling the dirt on him. So it is either the pills or I hit the sideboard with the booze.
I have never been totally responsible for dogs. We never had them as a child, we were a cat family. Dogs make me feel very humble. No matter how crappy a day I have had they are always really happy when I come home. A simple thing like a walk brings them such joy. They are a connection to Bryon as he was the "fun guy" to them. Off leash runs,chasing birds. I am terrified to run them off leash, I just don't have the confidence that Bryon had. They were finding this new reality hard at first. They were very protective of me, maybe I gave off an aura of vulnerability. Now except when I am at work they are always with me. Its reciprical we rely on each other. Through all of us we stay connected to Bryon.
It is after 10 at night and they are having a play. As Bryon used to say "it is the puppy hour"
Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone