Need to work

It's been 2 weeks since the company that I contract to has been on strike. Not being a union member I don't get strike pay but I try to stop by with donuts or ice cream to lend support. I really need for it to get settled, I have too much time on my hands. I go like crazy one day, cleaning, laundry, yard work and lay a hurting on myself that the next day I have to tone it back. It would be different if Bryon were here(I know that is such a dumb statement of course it would be better) I need to be busy and I loved my job. Too much time on Wendy's hands is not a good thing. I don't sleep well at night. I replay Bryons illness his last week his last day. I over analyze it, what could I have done or changed. I went back to the doctor last week. I thought the worse would be over, he's been gone 2 years 8 months shouldn't I be able to move on? He said that it takes people different times and some never really get over it. I will never forget I just want to get my heart and mind on the same page. In some ways I blame myself for his death. If I didn't have my four legged girls I think I might have gone a long time ago. I once asked : if I could have him back for 1/2 hour or 15 minutes would I. At that time I said "no" because I would loose him again. As I sit here tonight "YESYES"

I miss your silly joke, your Lester the lobster song......,, I miss you
💔
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