Tuesday

PET scan tomorrow, last Monday was an appointment with DR.N the onocologist. Just to see how Bry was doing. He is now officially on STD....o.k. get your minds out of the gutter, short term disability it stands for. His neck is very sore don't know why, he didn't sleep worth a darn last night so he has been sleeping since noon today. His appetite has almost gone, I try to tell him that 1 bottle of Boost does not a balanced daily intake make. I am going to have to make some soup or something. He is so tired and seems to hurt everywhere. It is hard to watch someone you love go through all this,it sucks the starch out of you. I think it is the helpless feeling. I know that somewhere there is someone who would gladly trade places with us.......but damn it all, right now it is all about US!!!!!!!!!!! Well meaning people tell me that " I am strong, that I will make it through this" Really, what are the options?????????? Sorry, I know that they mean well but I am in that kind of mood. I want to run away, just for awhile, run so far , this is hard to describe.