Faith, Hope and Widowhood. Cancer, Death and starting over.For so long cancer was our "elephant in the room" We knew it was there,we just never wanted to acknowlege it. This blog started out as our journey in Bryons fight to beat cancer, now it is my journey of trying to live again without Bryon.
It is hard to believe that it has been 11 months since Bryon died. Sometimes it feels like an eternity other times like it was yesterday. I still have my brother visiting until Saturday. Kathy left today.
posted by Sam I am or am I Wendy @ 11:45 AM
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Your husband dies, you start to come home to an empty house, the only conversation you have is with your two dogs. This has pretty much been my life for the last 11 months. That changed last Sunday when my brother and sister in law came from Toronto for a 2 week visit. Suddenly I started to plan meals, to cook. There was someone to greet me when I came home from work, there was conversation, and laughter. I have realized that since Bryon died I have been withdrawing from the outside world, only associating with it at work.I miss the banter while having dinner, the laughter, just having someone around. They have gone to Victoria for 3 days and once again my house is empty. They will be back on Saturday but leave the next weekend to return home. I thought I was doing well, I was used to the quiet, and to be frank I was getting used to being lonely. It's funny how one visit can change you,how one visit can reopen up wounds. I love having my family here, but all too soon they leave and the house will once again be empty.
posted by Sam I am or am I Wendy @ 9:03 PM
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Sometime it is really hard to be the person,to live your life the way you know your husband wanted you to. Bryon used to tell me that if he died and I met someone to jump at the chance. No way! Why would I ever put myself in the position of falling in love knowing full well that they would someday die. Besides I will always be in love with Bryon. He is my soul mate. It just sucks when you wake up depressed and sad. It doesn't help that we are about to enter the rainy season. One mental kick in the ass and let the day begin.
posted by Sam I am or am I Wendy @ 9:09 AM
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LONELY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
posted by Sam I am or am I Wendy @ 10:38 PM
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Great Grandbaby with my granddaughter Chelsea and Biily the babies father.
posted by Sam I am or am I Wendy @ 9:42 PM
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It has been almost 2 1/2 years since my husband died. This new change in my life has certainly had it's ups and downs. This is our story.
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