Feb 15

The day after Valentines Day. Bryon and I always joked that we didn't need a "Hallmark" day to tell one and other that we loved them. Yesterday I missed our usual bantering about this. I bought him a single red rose with babies breath, it sits next to him. I thought that this "new reality" was supposed to get better/easier....when??? I don't want to do anything, be anywhere nothing. I feel so insignificant, am questioning my own self worth. Everything just sucks. I have never been one to just sit, now I find myself doing just that....staring off into space. I have this feeling that I am slipping into depression...what a surprise.
Kris boyfriend came over tonight to use the table saw. Kris asked me if I minded....I lied and said "no" Damn it all it did bother me, illogically so. That was Bryons, he was the last one to use it, his hands turned the switch on. I know, stupid, stupid.